When You Are Feeling Rumpled in Spirit

Today, I am over at Arabah Joy’s for her weekly Grace & Truth Linkup. Come check it out!

Grace&Truth-300x300Some of my very favorite books are the Anne of Green Gables series. When Anne was feeling out of sorts, she would say that she felt rumpled in spirit.

I’ll be honest – this week, my spirits have definitely felt rumpled. In fact, I have felt sort of at a loss as to what to blog about on here. Have you ever felt like that – just sort of blah. It’s not like I’m feeling navy blue, more like light blue.

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I think it is a convergence of a lot of things – the end of a whirlwind of activity for one thing. I had my last official event at my house on Monday, and while that is a relief, there is also a bit of deflation when you get past a period of a lot of busy. It’s kind of that same feeling you get after Christmas is over.

My dad is also doing a bit worse lately. His numbers have gone up (which is not good), and so he has had to up his chemo treatments. Not only does that mean more frequent trips to Columbus, but it also means more side effects for him.

Not to mention, the world seems to be going to heck in a hand basket lately. Sometimes, I feel like I’m Alice and I’ve tumbled down the rabbit hole and everything I thought I knew is upside down and sideways.  My heart grieves for all the loss and pain and horror that happened in Orlando the other week. I can’t even imagine how difficult and dark these days are for the families of those who died.

I also feel rather bewildered by the backlash against Christians, too. It’s hard to hear people blame believers for this act of violence by someone who pledges allegiance to a belief system that is responsible for systemically killing Christians in the Middle East. It’s also, to be completely honest, kind of worrisome. It makes me fearful of the future and what that will bring. It makes it hard to know what to do or say, really. I’m feeling off balance.

Add to this a son entering a new chapter, and well, my spirit is definitely feeling a bit rumpled.

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This morning, I went to my favorite place to spend time with God – my back porch. I started out just telling God how I felt – kind of sad, kind of confused and kind of blah. I didn’t even crack my Bible open. I just sat there, sharing that I didn’t know what to write or what to say or even which direction to take.

As I sat there, I took in my surroundings. Now, I live in a city neighborhood, so it’s not like I’m out in the country. But this morning, the birds were singing and it was beautiful. The squirrels were playing tag up and down the trees, and one intrepid little guy jumped onto the hammock in my neighbor’s yard. He had such a hard time getting out until he finally flipped himself out where he sat there for a minute, kind of stunned. I laughed out loud because, when you aren’t the one stuck in the hammock, it is pretty funny.

While the birds were singing and the squirrels were being goofy, a rabbit came hopping into view. It turned and looked at me, kind of cocking its head as if to inquire who I was.

It might seem odd to some, but God met me on my porch. The Creator used His creation as a balm to my wadded up, wrinkled soul. I found myself cracking my Bible open, a spirit of hope invading fluffing my spirit.

God is always good to meet us right where we are at. I don’t know why I persist in thinking I need to somehow clean myself up or put up a spiritualized front when I spend time with God. Maybe it’s because I think He has to get tired of me and my petty, human issues, my whining and my weaknesses. God has shown me again and again, though, that He is ALWAYS faithful – even when I am not.

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He has the answers even when I don’t know the questions.

He wants to know me even when I feel not worth the effort.

He wants me to come to Him when I am weary even when I feel embarrassed by my weakness.

How about you? Are you feeling a bit rumpled in spirit too? Are you not even sure what to pray lately or like you’ve read the same verses over and over? God’s invitation to come to Him is a standing one – He is always open and He is always available. We never are too much of a bother or too much of an annoyance. His lovingkindness is everlasting and He wants to spend it on you. The question is, will you let Him?

Blessings, Rosanne

Believing What God Says About You

I’ve been reading through the book All the Places You’ll Go by Jon Ortberg, and since I am doing the workbook too, I’ve had the opportunity to revisit some of the Bible stories that are so familiar to me from my Sunday school days as a child. While I have re-read those as an adult (and I highly encourage you to do the same as I guarantee you will be kind of shocked about how non-G-rated the Old Testament stories actually are), it’s been a little while. So, when I got to the story of Gideon found in Judges 6 and 7, I settled in to really absorb the story – not as I have always remembered it but as it is written.

The book of Judges is filled with some pretty wild stories, but the plots are all the same. Israel would sin (this usually included worshiping other gods). God would punish them by allowing a neighboring country to oppress them. Eventually, Israel would get miserable enough that they’d repent and cry out to God, and God would raise up a judge and deliver them. Everything would go along fine for a while, and then they’d start worshiping other gods again and the story would repeat itself.

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When Judges 6 opens, Israel is in pretty dire shape. In Judges 6:2, it says, “The power of Midian prevailed against Israel. Because of Midian the sons of Israel made for themselves the dens which were in the mountains and the caves and the strongholds.”

Basically, what was happening was that every time the Israelites would start planting their crops, the Midians would come and destroy it all, including not just the crops but also all the livestock.

Our first glimpse of Gideon finds him secretly threshing wheat in a wine press. Not being a farm girl myself, I decided to look up what it meant to thresh wheat. Basically, the threshing floor was a large space where the wheat was laid down and oxen were lead across to crush it so the grain could be separated from the husks. A wine press was much smaller and enclosed (remember the I Love Lucy episode?). So, that means that Gideon was probably stomping around on the wheat himself. It also meant that nobody was making any wine either.

Things were bad in Israel.
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If you remember stories of Gideon from Sunday school, you probably remember the whole laying out the fleece a couple times. If you dig a little further back in your memory, you might recall that when God tells Gideon to raise an army, God whittles that army down to a mere 300 men (and this against an enemy that is described as locusts in number), and that God’s plan involved pitchers, torches and yelling in the middle of the night.

I have to say though, that the several things that stood out to me in this story were not ones I remembered.  The first thing that hit me was how the angel of God addressed Gideon. In Judges 6:12, it says, “The angel of the Lord appeared to him and said to him, “The Lord is with you, O valiant warrior.”

Valiant warrior was NOT how Gideon saw himself. It probably was not how other people saw Gideon either. This was a guy who was sneaking around in the middle of the night trying to thresh a tiny amount of wheat. He was not exactly hero material.

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Gideon points out all the awful things going on and questions that God is really with him, never mind everyone else. When the angel tells Gideon that God has a solution and Gideon reveals what he really thinks of himself.

Gideon immediately protests saying, “Oh Lord, how shall I deliver Israel? Behold, my family sit he least in Mannasseh, and I am the youngest in my father’s house.”

Throughout the story, it took a lot of convincing for Gideon to even begin to believe he was who God said he was – a valiant warrior. In his mind, he was the least of the least. His family were the ones that lived on the wrong side of the tracks. And even in his family, he was the youngest, the least important, invisible.

In my mind, I’m wondering how you can doubt what the angel is telling you because, well, there is an angel talking to you. If that isn’t proof positive that things aren’t what you’ve always thought, I don’t know what is.

Yet, don’t we do the same thing? God sent His Son to die for us. He paid a steep price to bring us into His family, so He should have a very clear idea of what kind of identity that gives us, as His children.

You may be saying, “Well, I know who I am in Christ?” My question to you is, “Are you living that way?”

Head knowledge lived out in confidence is true belief. 

The enemy wants you to not believe you really are who God says you are. He wants you to continue to think about what you lack in yourself. He wants you to continue to want signs and continual affirmation about your identity – because then you don’t actually DO anything. You are stuck and paralyzed.

Do you believe you are who God says you are? What parts of your identity are the hardest for you to believe? I’d love to hear about it!

Blessings, Rosanne

5 Minute Friday – Lose

It’s Friday again (how did that happen?), and it’s time for 5 Minute Friday. Not familiar with Five Minute Friday? Well, it’s simple really.  Women, from all over, write about one word for five minutes. No editing. No self-censoring. Just write and hit publish. Sound interesting? Then I encourage you to hop on over to Kate Motaung’s blog, Heading Home, and join us.

 

LOSE

Lately, I’ve been forcefully reminded that in order to move forward, to go through the doors God opens for me, I have to let go or lose something else.

I have to say no. I have to turn something down. Every yes choice I make, means saying no to something else. Because time is finite. No matter how organized or how productive I am, I am allotted 24 hours just like everyone else on the planet.

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To gain one thing, I lose something else.

But we don’t want to admit that, so we try to hang on to what we should be letting go of. In our world, anxiety and depression and that sense of drowning in the demands of our own lives is rampant.

And I think it lies in this simple truth – to swim, to stay afloat, we have to let go of or lose what is weighing us down. If we insist on hanging onto it, we WILL drown. 

Mark 8:36 says, “What does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul?

In many ways, in our culture today, we are losing our soul because we are trying to gain the entire world. There is so much pressure on every front, that it is no wonder our souls feel a bit shriveled and dry.

We go and go and go with no end in sight because we are afraid of losing – an opportunity, a moment, a met expectation.

But we weren’t made to do everything all the time for everyone, and the effort to do that is killing us slowly and surely.

I once read this quote and it has stayed with me. “The greatest freedom is the ability to choose our own prison.”

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Each choice we make means we lose the ability to make a different, opposite choice. Trying to hang onto both just tears us apart.

What do you need to lose today?

Blessings, Rosanne

Moving Forward in Grief

As the one year anniversary of my brother’s death approaches, I’ve found myself getting hit by waves of grief again. Like after a storm that had passed, those initial waves of grief had been much smaller and manageable over the past few months. So, I was kind of surprised when  bigger waves suddenly knocked me off my feet.

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It shouldn’t be a surprise really, but it was. See, grief is cyclical. We talk about the stages of grief like they are bus stops and once you are past them, you are done with that stage, but the truth is grief tends to cycle around. Sometimes, as you cycle through, you even hit a stage you missed the last time around.

It’s also not surprising really because our family is going through a major milestone. My oldest, Brock, graduated from high school. Things are changing, yet my brother is forever in the past. He is not part of this new present.

Another reason – at least I think this is a reason – is that over the past few months I’ve been crazy busy. (You can read about 6 Tips When Your Everyday Is Crazy HERE) And now that I’ve had a moment to slow down and to take a deep breath from all the happy busy of birthday parties and graduation and graduation parties, the reality of the permanence of brother’s death has hit me hard.

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The thing is, grief is not one big good-bye but a series of small ones. Each new milestone that your loved one isn’t present for is a small grief. The more milestones that pile up, the more final their death feels. You might wonder, well of course death is final – what in the world?

Well, after that first year, I can no longer say, “This time last year….”  I am making new memories of which my brother has no part. That’s how life is, of course, the living constantly move forward. But I am finding it hard to move forward because that means I leave my brother forever behind.

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In my mind’s eye, I picture it like we’ve all been in this meadow, and now my family and I are walking down the path, continuing our little hike.  But my brother stays in that meadow. I keep looking back over my shoulder, lingering, walking slowly, but my family, my friends, my life keeps moving forward on our path. I’m getting to that bend in the road, and I have to decide if I’m going to continue to move forward and lose sight of my brother. He’s still in the meadow, where he will forever stay.  Or am I going to stop, forever stuck between what was and what will be.

I think the healthy decision is to keep moving forward, but understanding the finality of death hurts. It doesn’t mean I can never visit the meadow, but I can’t stay there. I have to move forward. And that’s another form of good-bye.

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Have you dealt with grief? What are some things that have surprised you as you’ve worked through it? I’d love to hear about it!

Blessings, Rosanne

 

Do You WANT To Get Better?

Recently, I’ve been getting these little 3 to 5 minute podcast meditations from Emily Freeman (from Chatting at the Sky). Basically, she reads a scripture and talks about it, all with this lovely piano music playing in the background. She did seven of them, and they were just what I needed in my past very hectic week.

One of the passages she shared was in John 5:1-9. It’s the story of the man by the pool of Bethesda who was sick (although I’ve often heard him described as lame, no verse really says that specifically but since Jesus tells him to pick up his bed and walk, mobility was kind of an issue for him, whatever the actual problem he had).

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The verses tell us that an angel of the Lord would stir the water, and the first person in the water would be healed. Obviously, this was a big hangout for those who had various types of physical problems. In verse 3, it says, “In these lay a multitude of those who were sick, blind, lame, and withered, waiting for the moving of the waters.”

Our of all this multitude, there was a man who had been waiting for his turn in the waters for a long time. In fact, it says that he had been waiting 38 YEARS. I’m 43 years old, and I can’t imagine waiting for anything from kindergarten until now.

But this man had been lying by the side of that pool for almost four decades. During that time, he had probably seen the angel stir the water countless times, and every single time, someone else got in that water before he did and they were healed. The problem wasn’t that the miracle didn’t happen. The problem was that the miracle was happening for everyone BUT him. It was never his turn, and after 38 years, you have to wonder if he had started to doubt that it ever would be.

Yet, he kept showing up every day because it was the only hope he had, slim as it was.

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Jesus approaches him BECAUSE Jesus knew the man had been in his current condition for a long time. And then he asks a funny question. He asks the man, “Do you wish to get well?”

Thirty-eight years to the same place in the hopes he – the guy who was lame and had nobody to help him – could beat the hordes to the miracle and Jesus was asking if he wanted to get well?

 

I don’t know if the man had heard of this Jesus of Nazareth, but regardless, he answered politely (which quite honestly might have been more than I would have done under the circumstances. At the very least, I would have probably started laughing hysterically).

The man tells Jesus, “Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I am coming, another steps down before me.”

You’ll notice the man didn’t really answer Jesus’ question. Instead, he seems to be trying to explain his failure to get well all those years, like he thought maybe Jesus didn’t think he tried hard enough to participate in his own miracle.

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Then Jesus simply says, “Get up, pick up your pallet and walk.”

Eight simple words, and it says the man became well, picked up his pallet (or bed) and started walking.

All those years,

All that waiting,

All that trying,

All that disappointment every time he failed to make it in first.

And Jesus gives the man his miracle without any effort on the man’s part at all.

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I wonder what you’ve been waiting on, praying about, trying to fix or solve. It doesn’t have to be a physical ailment. It can be an emotional wound, a deep disappointment, something you keep failing at.

You keep showing up. Like the man by the pool, you get points for tenacity and perseverance, and I don’t want to undervalue that. After all, if the man hadn’t been at the pool, he would have not encountered Jesus.

When Jesus whispers, Do you want to get well? maybe you have to force down the hysterical laughter or prevent the angry words from spilling from your lips. Instead, you point to all the ways you have tried and failed, all the ways you aren’t up to the task of getting the miracle you’ve desperately been waiting for.

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The thing was, the man at the pool of Bethesda didn’t need a miracle. He needed Jesus.

And I’m wondering if maybe, just maybe, what you need isn’t another solution or another idea or another thing to try. I’m wondering if what you really need is Jesus, too.

So, do you want to get well?

Blessings, Rosanne

5 Minute Friday – WANT

It’s Friday again, and time for 5 Minute Fridays. Haven’t heard of it? Well, it’s when women from all over the country (and maybe even globe) get together and write about one word for five minutes with no editing and then push publish. Want to be part of the fun? Join us HERE!

WANT

You can’t look at Facebook or any other media channel over the past few days and not read someone’s letter or post or message to someone involved in the Brock Turner rape case. Usually, the letter is directed at Brock Turner’s father who (now famously) wrote a letter to the judge asking that his son not get a long prison term. Or the open letter is written to parents in general.

All of them share a general theme of what parents SHOULD be doing  so their child doesn’t become a Brock Turner. Anytime something like this happens, blame happens – usually at parents.

Why? Because we WANT a guarantee. If we can blame someone, then we convince ourselves we will or won’t do whatever that parent did or didn’t do, and then we won’t find ourselves sitting in a courtroom listening to the details of how our son sexually assaulted an unconscious young woman and forever changed and devastated her life. Forever destroyed his own life too.

We WANT to know we can prevent it if we just do this or avoid that or teach this. Unfortunately, there are no guarantees in parenting.

Brock Turner’s father has gotten a lot of condemnation for the letter he wrote, reducing what his son did to a young woman as “20 minutes of action.”

This very well may be a case of an indulged, privileged young man whose dad has always covered for him, who has always softened or mitigated the consequences of his son’s actions. That’s certainly what it appears to be on the surface. Brock Turner didn’t even seem particularly sorry for what he’d done – only made excuses and fabricated the best story to explain things in his favor.

First, let me say, there is NO QUESTION that what this young man did was horribly wrong. There is NO QUESTION that he has shattered a young woman’s life and that the consequences of that “20 minutes of action” will stay with her for the rest of her life. There has been a saying for a while that “no means no.” I’d like to add that unconscious should also mean no, that it shouldn’t even be a question really.

But, before we condemn the parents for the actions of the son and before we try and judge a man on the contents of one letter, let me just say I understand why Brock Turner’s father wrote that letter. I don’t agree with it, but I understand.

Because, you see, prison for a young man like Brock Turner would have been horror day after day. Do you have any idea what would have been done to a rich, privileged kid like that in prison? I bet Brock Turner’s father had an idea and that idea terrified him.

I understand why a father would go to any lengths to save his son from being beaten and probably raped repeatedly in a prison. I hope I would have the strength of character to allow my child to reap the consequences of so grave an action, but I would be tempted to try to save him, too. If you are really honest, you’d probably want to try to save your child, too.

Maybe some would say that is what Brock Turner deserves after what he did. Maybe they are right. All I know is that I’m glad Jesus didn’t give me what I deserve.

Yes, Brock Turner is NOT the victim in this particular scenario. The young woman he assaulted is the victim, and my heart and prayers go out to her. But Brock Turner’s parents are also in pain. If they were parents who did all the right things (and I don’t know that we can tell the caliber of their parenting by one letter written in probable desperation), I’m sure they are asking themselves what happened. I’m sure they are gutted and shattered to think a child of theirs could do something like this. If they didn’t do the right things and contributed to this young man’s attitude of taking what he wanted and feeling he was above consequences, then they will sit with the guilt of their failures daily for the rest of their lives.

Before you try, judge and condemn his parents, maybe you should take a moment and imagine it was your son facing prison and all that entails.

We all WANT that guarantee – the guarantee if we just do the right thing as parents then nothing bad will happen to our kids, that they won’t make bad choices, that they won’t do horrible things. But there is no guarantee and no amount of blame will change that.

Blessings, Rosanne

When Your Kids Are ALMOST Out of the Nest

Today, I am over at Arabah Joy for her link-up, Grace & Truth. Hop on over and check it out HERE!

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Maybe it’s my season of life, but this year when the robin couple built their nest in our down spouting, I paid closer attention than I normally do. What hit me was how very quickly those baby birds went from pretty blue eggs to perched on the edge of the nest, ready to fly. There are so many lessons to learn from that.

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However, what I also found interesting was how the baby birds had a period of time where they flew back and forth to the nest. They would fly to our porch railing or to the nearby tree, but they always returned to the nest -for shelter, for food, maybe for flying advice. I guess I always kind of thought baby birds learned to fly and they were gone – off on their own little avian adventures. However, these half grown birds, while they did fly away from the nest, came back regularly. In fact, that nest was looking a bit crowded and the Mama Bird was looking a bit harried as she tried to hang onto her perilous perch and feed her overgrown babies, now all squashed in the once roomy space.

And I realized there are a lot of lessons to be learned from half grown birds too.

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See, it wasn’t a clear cut moment in time where the baby bird took flight and then was gone. Instead, those half grown birds tested their wings. They flew a little ways away, but then came back to the nest – for shelter, for sustenance, maybe for more flying lessons. There was still more to teach even though those birds could technically fly.

Right now, we are entering a new season with our oldest son. On May 27, I watched as my son marched with his classmates down to the front of our auditorium. I watched as he stood up and calmly gave his valedictorian speech without so much as a tremor. I watched at his grad party as my normally quiet and reserved son mingled and greeted guests with the aplomb of a seasoned diplomat.

It would seem like he doesn’t need me or his dad anymore, like he is ready to fly the nest. But, that isn’t really true. As I watched the saga of the birds, I realized that those birds are like my son – just because he can now fly doesn’t mean he is supposed to fly away from the nest for good just yet. There are still things he needs to learn before he is totally independent.

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He still needs the shelter of the nest – not constantly like when he was young. Like those young birds, he can take longer and wider forays out into the world, knowing he has a safe place to land still.

He still needs the sustenance of the nest – not constantly like when he was young, but he has the ability to provide and find some of that sustenance himself. While that mama bird still brought worms to her young, she also allowed them to forage for themselves. Sometimes, they were successful and sometimes they were not, but failure was part of a learning process. The nest provided a bit of a safety net, but not completely anymore.

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He still needs a bit of flying advice – not the constant, daily instruction like when he was young, but he now has the freedom to try his wings and fly, too. One of the little birds liked to fly and hang out on our porch railing. Amateur photographer that I am, I kept trying to get pictures of the birds and the nest, but I couldn’t get close to the mama bird at all. The least little movement sent her winging away, scolding me as she went (and sometimes dive bombing my head). The little guy though – I could get very close to him on the railing. He wasn’t nearly as cautious as the mama bird which was both a good thing (for my photography purposes) and a bad thing (lots of stray cats around here). He was more willing to take chances, but he still had a lot to learn about the dangers of this world.

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I’ve heard it said that parenting a college-age student is one of the most challenging seasons because your child is no longer a child, but they also aren’t a full-fledged, independent adult either. It’s a time when they fly to and from the nest – sometimes leaving you to wonder if they are coming back at all and at other times making the nest feel a bit overcrowded.

 

What I noticed is that the little birds flew further and further away, coming less and less frequently to the nest. The mama bird provided less and less food, until one day, I noticed the nest was standing empty. Everyone had moved on, including the parents.

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I suppose that is what will happen with Brock too – eventually, he’ll spread his wings on the side of our nest for the last time, and when he returns, it won’t be for shelter or sustenance or guidance but for the relationship built during all the years spent in the nest.

I just hope we can navigate this in-between season as gracefully as the robins did.

Blessings, Rosanne

5 Minute Friday – CHEER

How did it get to be Friday, again? Today, I’m over at 5 Minute Friday. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s where women from all over write about one word without editing and without second guessing themselves. Come on over and join the party HERE.


Today’s word is CHEER.

 

Tonight, my oldest son graduates from high school. It’s a huge milestone, and to be honest, I haven’t really taken it in, the idea that we are all starting a new chapter, that things will change and then change some more.

The thing is, though, in some ways, things won’t change.

When you were born and a preemie, I cheered you on when you struggled to eat

As you got a bit older, I cheered you when you tried new foods – especially the green stuff.

I cheered you on when you took your first steps.

I cheered you on when rode your bike without training wheels.

I cheered you on your first and last soccer goal over the span of 10 years.

I cheered you on your first pitch and your first at bat.

I cheered you on when you learned to dribble.

I cheered you on at all those Pass, Dribble, Shoot competitions.

I cheered you on in the bleachers when you played your first junior high basketball game and then your first high school game.

I was still cheering for your very last game on the hardwood.

I will cheer you on as you give your Valedictorian speech, and I will cheer you on when you cross the stage to get your diploma.

I will continue to cheer you at each new chapter, each new opportunity, each new milestone.

Because I’m your mom, and I’ll always be your biggest cheerleader.

Blessings, Rosanne

When Loving Others is Difficult

If you are a certain age (or like oldies music), you’ll know the song, “All We Need is Love.” It sounds so good when the Beetles croon, “All we need is love, love, love is all we need.”

And loving everyone sounds like such a great thing – in theory. In reality, it’s not quite that simple because people are, well, human. Add to that our own humanness, and suddenly loving people isn’t all fluffy clouds and rainbows and unicorns.

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In fact, loving others can be one of the hardest commands God has ever given us – especially when we’ve been hurt or betrayed by those we are supposed to love. It’s particularly painful when the hurt comes from those who are supposed to have your back. No betrayal cuts quite as deep as the betrayal from the person you trusted the most.

I don’t think that this is a particularly new problem though. Over and over in Scripture, the early church is exhorted to love each other, to forgive each other, to offer grace to each other. I don’t think it would have been mentioned quite so much if those early Christians didn’t struggle with it, like we do.

Paul, the primary writer of the letters in the New Testament, tells us how crucial our love for each other is – because a lost world is watching. They are watching, looking for something they don’t have. Our love for each other is one way we show them who Jesus is.

I have to wonder, though, what message the unsaved world gets from the church if they are basing who Jesus is on by how we love each other. 

Let’s face it, the church as a whole is divided, not just along denominational lines and racial lines, but also within individual church bodies, as well. And I think satan rubs his hands in glee to see all the disunity among the family of God because when we are busy fighting with each other, we aren’t fighting the true enemy. We lower our shields and let our swords drop by our sides, making us easy targets for an enemy the Bible describes as a lion who is seeking to devour us.

Instead of clinging to our right to be right, maybe we should start clinging to Jesus instead. We are focused on things that, really, in the light of eternity don’t even matter. Will we really care if we got invited to that party or if someone said something unkind about us when we are in Jesus’ very presence in heaven?

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I’m not denying those things sting, but we have to keep the bigger picture in mind. And that bigger picture which is we are in a war. We can’t afford to turn on our fellow soldiers if we hope to come out in one piece.

I’m talking to myself just as much as the next person in this. It’s so easy to get caught up in the daily stuff I am living in. It’s all too easy to make a mountain range out of an ant hill. I get it. But know that this is what the enemy wants.

If he can turn us on each other, we do the work of devouring for him.

In Galatians 5:15, it says, “But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another.”

 

That word consume means to use up or destroy. It sounds horrible, doesn’t it? Yet, how many times have you felt yourself being used up or destroyed by someone actions or words? How many times have you been the one doing the devouring and consuming?

I wish I could say that if you just get spiritual enough, that everything at your church and with the people there will be smooth sailing, that everyone will just love each other perfectly and never hurt each other, intentionally or unintentionally. But that’s not the truth and we know it.

But I do think we can make a choice to not be easily offended, to not look for insult and hurt where it wasn’t intended or let it go when it was. Often those things say so much more about the other person than you. I think we can make the choice to be mature in our relationships. If we have something that is truly bothering us, that we can’t let go – go to the person in love and get it straightened out. So many times, it’s a simple misunderstanding that honesty resolves.

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Unfortunately, no matter our good intentions, the bad news is there is no way we can love each other as we are called to do. However, the good news is that we don’t have to do it in our own power.

 

Thankfully, God promises us that we are, “equipped for every good work.” I don’t know about you, but that is a big relief, to know I can lean on God to help me do the hard stuff – even loving the unlovable.

How about you? Do you struggle loving others? I’d love to hear about it!

Blessings, Rosanne

5 Minute Friday – Expect

It’s Friday and that means it’s time for 5 Minute Fridays, where women from all over write for 5 minutes on a specific topic – no editing, no planning, no SEO – just writing. You can head over HERE to join the party!

 

The topic today is EXPECT.

I obviously don’t have time to look up the word expect since I only have five minutes, but the idea of expecting something means there is always the opportunity for disappointment isn’t there? How many times has someone let you down or not met your expectations in some way? It’s hard isn’t it.

Yet at the same time, I don’t want to become that person who always expects the worst of people either. I will confess that I have a tendency toward becoming cynical, so while I want to believe the best of everyone, experience has taught me – sometimes painfully – that sometimes it’s better to have no expectations rather than have them disappointed.

The thing is though, I can take that idea of low expectations and apply it to God. Because, let’s be honest, haven’t you prayed for something and the answer you got was No or maybe what felt like silence – and while you hate to admit it, you feel a little like God let you down. That He disappointed you. It can make you feel like you can’t expect from Him either.

But the truth is, God is always FOR us – even when His answer is NO. I was reading this morning in Lamentations about God’s lovingkindness and His mercy is new every morning. While we have no guarantee that God will always answer our prayers or orchestrate our lives the way we WANT Him to, we do have the assurance of His love  and His presence.

We do have the promise that nothing – not even the demons of hell – can take us away from our Father’s love. There is a verse in Malachi (I think – again, that whole 5 minute thing means I can’t look it up!) that talks about waiting on the Lord with excited expectation.

I have to ask myself – do I wait on the Lord like that? Do I wait with great expectation to see what God is going to do – no matter the circumstance?

We have evidence in the form of His Word that some of God’s greatest glory showings came when His people were in the worst spots. I mean, God LED the children of Israel to the Red Sea. It looked pretty bleak, but He showed up BIG TIME.

In Ephesians it says that God does above and beyond anything we can ask or even think to ask. I don’t know about you, but I want to live my life with that kind of expectation. Anne Shirley often talked about the excitement of seeing what was around the bend in the road.

What’s your bend in the road and are you waiting for it with great expectation?

Blessings, Rosanne

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