The irony is not lost on me that when I went to publish my first post on Breaking the Bondage of Busyness, I realized I had been in such a rush the night before that I Didn’t Save My Final Draft! And of course, I didn’t have time this morning to finish before going to do story hour at our local library, so here I am, behind schedule as usual feeling slightly frazzled because I should really be editing religious briefs for the newspaper right now – at least that is what I have written in my calendar for this time slot.
But instead of letting that frazzled feeling grow into a true tizzy of panic (and maybe banging my head on my desk), I’ve decided to take a deep breath. After all, part of the reason I’m writing this series is to break my own bondage to busyness.
One of the things I’ve noticed, at least in my own life, that one of the first things busyness kills is true fellowship.
I recently did a Kelly Minter study on I, II and III John. To be honest, while I have read those books of the Bible, I have never studied them. Can I just say, I absolutely LOVED them! If you have a chance, pick up Minter’s study, What Love Is.
One of the key words in the book of I John is the word fellowship. The verse in I John 1:3 caught my attention.
“What we have seen and heard we proclaim to you also, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father, and with His Son Jesus Christ.” (emphasis mine)
Wouldn’t it seem to you that John would tell these believers all that he had seen and heard and touched (after all, the man walked with Jesus here on this earth), so they could, I don’t know, live a better life or do more for God or even know God better?
But nope – the reason is so these believers could have fellowship with other believers. Obviously, the idea of fellowship was deeply important to John.
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Maybe this was because he was a part of the fellowship of the twelve disciples. I’m sure they were a tight knit group – even with all their inner squabbling about who would be more important.
Or maybe it was because John was part of the very first church where fellowship was a key part of their worship and spiritual growth.
Or maybe it was because of the words of Paul in Galatians and I Corinthians where he likens Christians to a body. A body certainly has fellowship with itself. It’s not like our liver goes out on its own or your foot takes a walk by itself.
The thing is, God created us for fellowship. Even in the Garden of Eden when Adam was in a perfect paradise, God said it wasn’t good for him to be alone. Granted, in this case, God gave Adam a wife, but God could have made it so Adam hung out by himself, too. After all, the man was living in paradise where everything was perfect. But God didn’t do that. Instead he created humans to need other humans.
That is still true today, but the thing with our crazy, modern lives is that while we are constantly connected, we very rarely experience true fellowship.
I love Facebook as much as the next person, but it isn’t really made for anything other than rather shallow dives into the lives of others. It’s hard to tweet what’s on your heart in 140 characters or less, and even if a picture is worth a thousand words, that picture may not even be a reflection of what is really going on in someone’s life.
How many people do you really know and when you compare their social media account to their real lives there is a monumental gap between the perception and the reality? Or even your own life. I know I don’t put all the nitty gritty stuff on Facebook (and I’m a pretty real, let-it-all-hang-out type of girl) because honestly, social media isn’t really made to be a place of deep knowing.
While I have developed real relationships with other women online, those relationships took time and energy to forge. I’ve belonged to a mom’s group since my youngest was 2 years old. He’s now 14. Our lives have changed and morphed, but we pray for each other and support each other through births, through rocky marriages, and even death. It’s a beautiful thing. Even on that board, there are some women I know more deeply because we have talked through email or on the phone. We have consciously made our connections deeper.
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But online friends don’t take the place of friends who are bone and flesh, either. How is it that despite the whirlwind of activity among crowds of people that make up most of our lives, a common theme among women is feeling they are doing life all alone?
This is true even in our churches because activities aren’t fellowship either. While I enjoy a women’s event as much as the next person, these are not places that generally forge deep fellowship. They can open the door to fellowship, but true fellowship takes time and energy and investment – something many of us can’t imagine doing because we are already running on fumes.
But we yearn for it, and that’s not a mistake because God made us for fellowship – particularly with other believers. The Greek word used in the verse above is koinonia and it means community, communion, joint participation or intimacy. It’s also a term that is sometimes used for sex in the Bible. When you see that euphemism that so and so “knew” his wife – that is what they are talking about.
Over and over again in the New Testament, there are instructions and exhortations on how to live in fellowship with other believers. Paul says that unbelievers will know we belong to Christ by the way we love each other.
That gives me pause because I wonder what people see when they look at my life? How about yours?
The truth is real fellowship is not just connecting. It is soul to soul communication and that doesn’t happen without the investment of time. Something we all seem to be in short supply of these days.
God tells us He saved us so we could have abundant life. I believe part of that abundance is our fellowship with other believers. When we let busyness chain us to the master of urgency, our lives don’t feel so abundant. In fact, they seem a bit depleted.
I don’t know about you, but I’m tired (figuratively AND literally) of doing life in a way that doesn’t tap into all that God has for me here on this earth, including true fellowship. Are you ready to do life differently too? I hope you’ll join me this month as we look at ways to break those bonds of busyness so we can truly live.
Blessings, Rosanne
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